Home Study Questions
I've had a lot of interest in the questions we were asked during the home visits. And so, I present to you a (partial) list. I can't remember all of them, but this should give you a pretty good idea.
Questions as a couple:
Why did you choose adoption?
Who was the driving force and who was more hesitant?
Why Bulgaria?
What if adoption from Bulgaria shuts down and you have to choose another country?
What do you know about Bulgaria?
What were your families reactions?
What issues will your families have with you adopting a child of a different race?
How did you meet?
What are your strengths as a couple?
What areas could you improve?
What challenges have you faced?
Tell me about your first year of marriage.
Tell me about deployments. How often? How long? Support systems?
Who do you go to for advice?
Outside of each other, who do you go to for support?
How do you deal with the unexpected?
What are some unmet expectations you've faced?
What decisions have you made that your family has disapproved of?
Describe kids physical characteristics.
Kids strengths?
How do you discipline?
What has been the biggest challenge with your kids?
What are your plans to help them adjust to the adoption?
Have you ever been to therapy?
What are your thoughts on counseling and medication?
What does your church think about counseling?
What does your church think about adoption?
Describe the diversity of your church.
What are your family traditions?
How do you plan to incorporate Bulgarian traditions?
Who is the spender/saver?
Kids Questions:
What do you do for fun?
Do mom and dad love you? How do you know?
What happens when you get in trouble?
Do you ever get hit?
Do you feel safe?
Tell me about your school.
What is your favorite toy?
Do you ever share a bed?
Do you want more kids in your family?
Individual Questions: (Caleb had some slightly different questions due to different experiences)
Tell me about your childhood.
What is your relationship like with your parents? Siblings?
How frequently do you talk to them?
Family specifics (ages, where they live, jobs, etc.)
What was the hardest thing you experienced in childhood?
How were you disciplined?
Who was more strict?
What was missing from your childhood?
Did you feel loved? Safe?
How did you know you were loved/safe?
What was daily life like?
What did you do for fun?
Did you enjoy school?
Was it difficult?
Tell me about your friends.
Tell me about a time you wanted to quit something.
Tell me about a time you let someone down.
Tell me about your career...did you enjoy it? plans to go back to work?
What makes you uncomfortable in relationships?
What is your biggest strength?
In what area could you grow?
What is Caleb's biggest strength?
In what area could he grow?
Tell me about your relationship with your kids.
How do you parent?
How much of your self-worth/value is based in parenting?
What does this phrase mean to you: "Adoption is for life."/"The grief and loss of adoption."
On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you in your marriage.
When that was all said and done, we had to answer:
What is your biggest fear in adoption?
At this point, how comfortable are you moving forward with the adoption.
Then the social worker left and we collapsed on the couch completely worn out...
What are your plans to help them adjust to the adoption?
Have you ever been to therapy?
What are your thoughts on counseling and medication?
What does your church think about counseling?
What does your church think about adoption?
Describe the diversity of your church.
What are your family traditions?
How do you plan to incorporate Bulgarian traditions?
Who is the spender/saver?
Kids Questions:
What do you do for fun?
Do mom and dad love you? How do you know?
What happens when you get in trouble?
Do you ever get hit?
Do you feel safe?
Tell me about your school.
What is your favorite toy?
Do you ever share a bed?
Do you want more kids in your family?
Individual Questions: (Caleb had some slightly different questions due to different experiences)
Tell me about your childhood.
What is your relationship like with your parents? Siblings?
How frequently do you talk to them?
Family specifics (ages, where they live, jobs, etc.)
What was the hardest thing you experienced in childhood?
How were you disciplined?
Who was more strict?
What was missing from your childhood?
Did you feel loved? Safe?
How did you know you were loved/safe?
What was daily life like?
What did you do for fun?
Did you enjoy school?
Was it difficult?
Tell me about your friends.
Tell me about a time you wanted to quit something.
Tell me about a time you let someone down.
Tell me about your career...did you enjoy it? plans to go back to work?
What makes you uncomfortable in relationships?
What is your biggest strength?
In what area could you grow?
What is Caleb's biggest strength?
In what area could he grow?
Tell me about your relationship with your kids.
How do you parent?
How much of your self-worth/value is based in parenting?
What does this phrase mean to you: "Adoption is for life."/"The grief and loss of adoption."
On a scale of 1-10, how satisfied are you in your marriage.
When that was all said and done, we had to answer:
What is your biggest fear in adoption?
At this point, how comfortable are you moving forward with the adoption.
Then the social worker left and we collapsed on the couch completely worn out...
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